Why I think Washington D.C. is one of the most dangerous places in the world

1. Everytime I watch the news, I hear about innocent kids or parents caught in the crossfire of people shooting each other.
2. People don't know how to use their blinker.
3. People think that because they are driving a Cadillac, they can perform 3-point u-turns and block the whole street for over 10 minutes.
4. We all live and work close to the most hated person in the world: The current US President.
5. They already tried to crash a few planes into this city... They will try again.
6. Last but not least: Cicadas (2"long flying roaches with red eyes) have invaded the city for the first time in 17 years. There are millions and millions of them in the region. They is NO way for anyone to remain calm when they fly right at you!!! You can imagine the rest: people falling off their bikes, kids... or grown ups running away from them, car accidents... you imagine the rest!